"Loving life and life is living... very special."Some things don't change, and other things won't change. I'm dealing with the 'other' things. Nothing is expected nor accepted anymore. I've now accepted that I need stay within boundaries and 'do me', ha whatever that means -_-
Didn't go to school today and I kinda wish I had. "Sucks being sick." I won't explain why that's in quotes but today was almost pointless. Got nothing done, like always. That's expected and accepted, I procrastinate endlessly. Anyway, my life was like put on hold for about a month 'cause I was almost doubting myself but everything was confirmed today. That whole statement should be in quotes... Moving on. I still can't speak clearly. Along with my slight speech impediment, my voice is gone as it has been for about 3 weeks now. So when I call Pizza Hut and talk to a 'foreign girl' she can't understand me. She was later dubbed retarded by me. Said 'huh' about 5 times to me. I mean she could have at least said 'excuse me, can you repeat that?' Smh... Anyway. I sound like a man. Although I can't speak I can still write. Not like write write. No Def Poetry stuff, just a story or two. That's another I can't stand. Those who have a pen and paper & have seen the poetry special at the last Talent Night, you are not going to start writing and become the 21st Century's Hemingway or Confucius. My point isn't really proven with all my run- on sentences but haikus and short stories will not take you too far, get a job. Not downing anyone that is pursuing this, but it's just like these new photographers... mm enough said.
It would be a good idea to not make decisions when infuriated. 'Cause, you know, that means thoughts aren't straight. But my mind is clear, too clear almost. I know what I need, and I know I'm not happy. Lead by example, actions speak louder than words.
Got a lot of time on my hands... no no no, slowly. Getting back to what I used to be, literally. My hair is going back to red, my thoughts are going back to being lonely, my time is back to being mine and I'm ready to break out, & fly... here come the analogies: I'm not ok with my wings yet. They were placed on my sandals, so when they flap I just flip over and over 'cause I have no balance. At my feet is the world, I'm barely floating above ground. Like still considered to be stuck in this little city 'cause I can't go anywhere far. But this is what I expected ha.
You wanna give me what I need, won't cha ?... Who knows the rest of this ? Mm figure it out.
"Happy ending within any ending story."
