Scatter Brain.

Biggest smh for the day. My Facebook will deactivated in due time, I'm still considering whether or not it will be indefinite. If it's thaat important, you can just text me. It's becoming too much like Twitter, when in all likeness I don't care about every one's day, all day long. It's also becoming too much like MySpace, a safe haven for random people to see what I do weekly at least. Also it's too much of the ValleyBoy stomping ground. I still wish there were a DISLIKE button, I dislike a lot of the ignorance. That's my reason for deactivation, there's no DISLIKE button -_-

More or less.

My Joke of the Day: 'Yo mama's so lame she tried out for LAB's Dance Team'

I can't even front though, I went to that meeting today to see what it'd be all about. Quickly realized I have NO time to be on another team. I'd seriously rather dribble a basketball than move my hips at home football game.

TODAY'S KIA'S BIRTHDAY !!

I tried to the whole 'through the years' thing, but all the older pictures are on my laptop. Anyway I love her with everything. She knows everything about me, yes more than anyone else. This weeekend should be goood :D I love you girl !




A lot of birthdays coming up this season and I can't wait.

Sickly like. Aching like.
Sinus Infection & a sprained wrist & elbow.

Hoping to God we don't get school Friday

NO SCHOOL FRIDAY, officially :D

September.

My People.

Grandpa Fred's

Expected.

"Loving life and life is living... very special."

Some things don't change, and other things won't change. I'm dealing with the 'other' things. Nothing is expected nor accepted anymore. I've now accepted that I need stay within boundaries and 'do me', ha whatever that means -_-

Didn't go to school today and I kinda wish I had. "Sucks being sick." I won't explain why that's in quotes but today was almost pointless. Got nothing done, like always. That's expected and accepted, I procrastinate endlessly. Anyway, my life was like put on hold for about a month 'cause I was almost doubting myself but everything was confirmed today. That whole statement should be in quotes... Moving on. I still can't speak clearly. Along with my slight speech impediment, my voice is gone as it has been for about 3 weeks now. So when I call Pizza Hut and talk to a 'foreign girl' she can't understand me. She was later dubbed retarded by me. Said 'huh' about 5 times to me. I mean she could have at least said 'excuse me, can you repeat that?' Smh... Anyway. I sound like a man. Although I can't speak I can still write. Not like write write. No Def Poetry stuff, just a story or two. That's another I can't stand. Those who have a pen and paper & have seen the poetry special at the last Talent Night, you are not going to start writing and become the 21st Century's Hemingway or Confucius. My point isn't really proven with all my run- on sentences but haikus and short stories will not take you too far, get a job. Not downing anyone that is pursuing this, but it's just like these new photographers... mm enough said.

It would be a good idea to not make decisions when infuriated. 'Cause, you know, that means thoughts aren't straight. But my mind is clear, too clear almost. I know what I need, and I know I'm not happy. Lead by example, actions speak louder than words.

Got a lot of time on my hands... no no no, slowly. Getting back to what I used to be, literally. My hair is going back to red, my thoughts are going back to being lonely, my time is back to being mine and I'm ready to break out, & fly... here come the analogies: I'm not ok with my wings yet. They were placed on my sandals, so when they flap I just flip over and over 'cause I have no balance. At my feet is the world, I'm barely floating above ground. Like still considered to be stuck in this little city 'cause I can't go anywhere far. But this is what I expected ha.

You wanna give me what I need, won't cha ?... Who knows the rest of this ? Mm figure it out.

"Happy ending within any ending story."

"SYMF"

There's more, so I'll be back.

Seemed appropriate -_-

Deleted.

I did it, I deleted my MYSPACE (:

Tie My Hands.

I don't want to do anything else. I am anticipating being overwhelmed by next week. I can feel it happening.

To Whom It May Concern:

This is for several different people. Find the one that pertains to you.

1. I don't want to be friends, I don't think we should ever talk anymore. I'm annoyed with your ignorance to the fact of my actually liking you. It's not that our phones are messing up or anything, I'm just not responding to you. Sure I'll sign on aim, it won't make a difference to you 'cause you're blocked. I try so hard not to be mean so I'll never actually say this to your face, I just need to get it off my chest.
2. I wish your life would end. I will not put anymore energy into this situation but I wish you didn't exsist. I only know of three people who would care if your life ended, two of them are your parents. I guess if you died people would care, you know a life is something precious. I just feel yours isn't, at the moment at least. I also wish you would keep my name out of your mouth, on some serious killer killer stuff. Actually, I don't wish you'd die. I want something really bad to happen to you. Nothing physical. I won't be the one to do it though; I don't have time, gots homework to do (:
3. I miss you guys. I wish it were still like 9th & 10th grade when having fun was like innocent and the only drama was the 'LAB drama'. Back when we talked about ourselves and didn't worry about anyone else.
4. I wish you weren't a whore because everyone knows it. I don't think I have to say anything more on that one ha.
5. Has anyone ever told you that you aren't cute ? I wish I could, but I feel bad.
6. I make this face every time someone says your name: -_-. Yea, four people today asked how you're doing. I couldn't honestly answer because I have no idea, although I honestly wish I did.
7. Why do you eat lunch with us ? We don't like you. Well at least I don't. Super high school drama but I don't care, I'm annoyed.
8. You are the most annoying person in my life, I swear. But you're one my closest, not going anywhere. I'm tired of you choosing 'your wife/ husband' (I don't know who the man is in your relationship) over pretty much everything else going for you. They don't care about anything but themselves.
9. How old are you now ? I really don't know but I do know that you're grown. Stop taking pictures in the bathroom with your bathing suit on. Stop taking pictures with your lips all puckered up and your camera in your right hand 4 ft away from your face. Get someone else to take a picture of you. I'm sure your grown ass has some friend that is aspiring to be a photographer and will take your flick.
10. This is to no one: Overall I'm actually really disappointed in things right now. I wish it was me who was happy again -_-

Half of these people will never see this, for half of these people wouldn't even know that I actually think about them.

"IF YOU WANT TO BE LESS MORAL, LESS COORDINATED AND LESS INTERESTING, DRINK ALCOHOL."- Mr. Weitzel

The weekend's over and I'm still sick. And annoyed, parched, drained, not entertained, and unenthused. I live with the biggest idiots. I don't get why I, me of all people, have been blessed with them -_-

My obsession with time has been proven. It was never stated but I've always know that I have some fetish with the time. All that to say, I no longer have any time for anything. My weeks are now almost planned out til like October. I've always wanted it to be this way, always being preoccupied. Now, I am. Very much needed in order to keep my mind off certain things. Everything seems to make me want to stop. Like, take a seat and wait 'til I catch my breath. I'm really on this 'been there, done that & no thanks' attitude. But no one seems to understand the 'no' part. Lol... ridiculous things come from nay sayers.

There were things I wanted to do when I had time. Go here & there. Now I have to think about my schedule before I do anything. My time isn't being taken up because of school oriented things(well not all of it...) but because of commitments I've made to others for myself. Won't go into those at the moment.

No complaints right now... Well there are a few. Oh man so I get my car tomorrow apparently. Key word: apparently. They have been telling me for two weeks now, almost three, that I'm getting a car and where I have been sitting this whole time ?... THE PASSANGER SEAT -_-. My hair's turning red again, so much for getting it done. I wish I was bold enough to cut my hair off, ya know a cute little short cut. But I'm not, so I won't.

I'll depart with this...

Sick&Tired

I have to much to do to be sick, but I am. Pretty bad like, throatache, I still can't speak normal & my eyes are puffy and keep watering. On top of all that, my body aches from volleyball. I overextended my shoulder so that pain just won't quit. I was actually looking forward to the weekend but I'm just too exhausted to anything. We'll see how this one goes.

Involuntary Releases Of Ignorance.

Four days down, 176 more. AP Statistics is the only class I get homework in. It feels good to have a math class again, I felt like I was slacking ha. I have no real elective, all real credit classes. ASB is now beginning & this year will be sick. Who's down for Popeye's at all our events ? I need it@ at least one event. Mm, this year should go by quick, and I'm really ok with that.

These are my people -_-