Here's to the past, the 'wonder' years. Here's to the future, I'm done with the past. Here's to the present, the reason I need a drink. Here's to forever, let's get this started.

Just got home from the annual awards ceremony at Los Angeles Baptist HS. Reaffirmed my reason for never wearing skirts. Re-realized my loathe for people. And reinclinated my love for the end of school years.

Reminds me of BJ.

By the time the American child reaches their 18th year of life and 12th year of school, everything completely necessary is learned. Education is redundant, on every level. High school is redundant. I don't care how much math will be around you in everyday life, all I needed was Algebra 1. If dictionaries were still in heavy circulation as they were in the early nineties, English 10 would have been enough. God created everything for a purpose as a purpose, and I believe that. Science up to the 7th grade would have been sufficient. No one is learning from the past and the idiocracy our Fore Fathers generated, therefore those writing our history books are doing nothing for us. Those writing our history books are wasting their lives. I feel everyone who wants to remember something should write it down for themselves and remember what they wish. Columbus did not change my life and I won't be changing anyone's in the future, so don't write this down.

Over and over we are reminded that two doubled equals four. Four can also be reached by adding two by two. Common knowledge is repeated, basic comprehension is reinstated and fundamentals are recapitulated. If you read that over, you should understand. My peers who are quote unquote smarter than are nothing more that my peers who choose different lifestyles. Because they pour their lives into their education does not meant they are smarter. Shoot, yea, they're smarter. Smart enough to know that if you pour your lives into education, you'll gain more knowledge. I know that, too. So I'm also smart, I just don't choose collegiate education. I chose the route of gaining, retaining, and containing education through life. The type of life that is not apart of a curriculum with redundant tendencies.

I had more to say on this subject but my mind just went other places and I can't move on.

"Mindsets we will never move to."

And they all lived happily ever after?

My future is already written, I wrote it, and half of you won't be there, unless maybe, you pay me, even then I doubt it, I want to be paid in FunDip, no shits & giggles. Thought I should use a period. I know how frustrated I get about grammatical errors. And spelling errors. Hate them. Hate everything. Kinda sad. Well it's cool for me. Ha it's chill. Mhm. Chill. I wish that saying would die. Kinda like the word bro. Or is it spelled broh? Nah. I'm sure it's bro. I should probably use a comma or something, yup. Speaking of yup, how 'bout Trey Songz? Or no, how 'bout Chris Brown tryna be like Trey Songz with his lameass sexy mixtape? Or how 'bout everyone thinking they can have a mixtape? Or what about the fact that no one is getting paid for making a mixtape? I need a job paying at least $8.25 before I pay for studio time. Or waste time on YouTube and an instrumental. Yea, dead that. How 'bout everyone graduating & then forgetting how to spell? All on Facebook calling niggas bros and can't spell definitely correct. Speaking of Facebook, I want to delete mine. Also speaking of that, I have a boyfriend again & it's Facebook official. With comments and everything. Mhm, gag me. Speaking of gag, and like death, there was a bomb threat today at Disneyland. Someone left a backpack so the Disneyland SWAT crew thought it was a bomb. No, it was some kids' lunch. This face. Um. Keep all hands, feet and objects in the vehicles at all times. I only have two hands & two feet. Was ALL necessary? And my objects, I won't be carrying to much on the Mattahorn. I also bought my brother and sister a souvenir today. Elijah a T-shirt and Leila a book. Leila loved hers and Elijah hated his. Really disappointing. Like it honestly hurt to see his face and response. I think I'm done talking, this might turn depressing.

Life is the longest thing we have to do. Everyone needs to stop saying it's so short.That doesn't help the situation. What we all need to do is embrace the fact we will die, and that's when life gets short. At least your life. Others' lives will go on and they too will realize life is as long as you make it. As long as YOU make it.

We all don't need love and we all don't want love. Everyone needs to stop generalizing what love is. Your dictionary won't tell you and you won't know it when you feel it. You can't feel what you don't know. You have to tell yourself you want to strongly feel for something/ someone and you will. After you tell yourself that, there is no looking back.

The definition of happy is not what we make it be. It's what we are told. We are told longevity with the one/ things we love makes us happy. Well, pure happiness in a sense. Just give up on trying to be philosophical on what you think you feel. We're happy because we told ourself we are based on what we are told.

Yes, I made this a we thing. We're all here doing the same thing. Living our lives to say we loved every minute of it when it comes time to pass.

I hated her character in this movie.

I feel bad for Helen Keller and all others who are deaf & blind. All she had was touch and taste. She endured the feelings of touch. The only thing she could do was feel. She endured tastes of defeat, the tastes of agony, the tastes of sorrow. She was stuck in her head, literally to only dream and think of what she tasted and felt. Yes, I'm sure she tasted more than morose states of being. Just sayin', 'cause when it came down to it, all that she wrote that was joyous was of her dreams and thoughts. We (we being the people with sight and hearing abilities) spend our lives reaching for our dreams, hiding our thoughts and complaining about what we feel.

I can see, and that is why I can be happy, in what you call the dark, but which to me is golden. I can see a God-made world, not a manmade world. Helen Keller

“This is to all the ifs and to the wishes that’ll never come true. This is to all the words you never said and to the ones we choke on. This is to holding your breath in that one perfect moment and being terrified that you’ll blink and it’ll all be gone. This is to when it is all gone and you feel like you have nothing left. This is to realizing that it wasn’t your fault. And that they’re never coming back. This is to those who never got to say goodbye after saying something harsh before they left."

This is to not feeling.

I stopped trying & I feel better.

What are you doing ?

Happy Mother's Day & Happy Birthday to Rena Calhoun.

The best mom in the whole wide world and one of the best friends in the whole wide world.

Moving on to CIF Prelims(:

I'm living with two emotional hypocritical ass females while trying to help raise two badass emotional children. I need a massage and an apartment by myself.

You’re beautiful,

but you’re empty…. No one could die for you.

— Antoine de Saint Exupéry, The Little Prince

Update.

Hair is all one color: Dark Natural Brown

Prom is Saturday, May 1.

Golf Tournament is Monday, May 3.

Rena's birthday dinner is Saturday, May 8.

Senior Trip is Wednesday, May 19.

Last Day of School/ Grad Night is Thursday, May 27.

Graduation is Saturday, May 29.

Vegas: Sunday, May 39- Wednesday, June 2.

Camping: Thursday, June 11- Sunday, June 13.

Hawaii: Monday, June 14- Monday, June 21.

The next two months should be grand.