Her album dropped today, I need it.

I'm in love with her life, minus him.

Gotta Find Peace Of Mind.

All I wanted was some cute shit, like buy me a ring and promise you'll be here forever. But this isn't a sappy love movie where forever means even after death. So the rings in my life cost $67,000 and turn fingers green. Green in envy with the price tag neither of us were down to sacrifice for. But you know, broke niggas need love too. So he loves me and I love him. Addicted to this love. Torn and confused & here we are now, lucky we survived it all.

Winter Formal 2010

My life obviously used to be much more interesting 'cause I used to write all about it. I probably just had a lot more on my mind, 'cause I actually wrote about it. Almost two years of using this and I'm obviously much different now.

THEN

NOW.

'Least I look the same ? A lot less tan ha.

Doubtful.

Submit ?

Drama thrives in that of the dweller. Dweller stuck in the past & one who only lingers in the present. The dreamer of the future is emancipated yet hopeful in the dwellings of his choices. Given the chance to choose the future, this resident would thrive on his own fortuity. The drama thrives in that of the dweller who doesn't acquit that of his dwellings. To occupy the sense of this common dwelling, we are shown the options. With a haphazard sense of occupancy our options are limited. By chance we are given a future that we have the choice to dwell in. With our choices we are liberated, but in some cases we are dwelling. Dwelling in all that we choose to be given. Our futures are only chosen by change. That change given to us by our own liberation. Such a change determined or marked by whim or caprice rather than reason. The tenure of our intellect is being possessed with thoughts of permutation. Minds being confiscated by the prose left from the dwellings made in the past. Although the dreamer has not yet reached his emancipation, the liberation comes in the dream of no longer dwelling.

Should I submit this for the literary compilation ?

AOL wants to tell my email is invalid. I've had this email since the ninth grade. ITS VALID AOL, I SWEAR TO YOU, IT IS!

THE VENDING MACHINE gave me a Rice Krispy Treat when I wanted a bag of pretzels. 44 constitutes a Rice Krispy, I PRESSED 42 !

I miss liking people, I now hate the sight of everyone.

Never knew anything more true.

Oh black people.

Audrey Hepburn

Isn't it strange that day by day nothing changes, but when you look back nothing is the same & NOW ITS JANUARY 2010.

Adios 2009, it's been real.

MERRY CHRISTMAS.

Exactly what I want.

Mystery of Iniquity

Ya'll can't handle the truth in a courtroom of lies

Perjures the jurors

Witness despised

Crooked lawyers

False Indictments publicized

Its entertainment...the arraignments

The subpoenas

High profile gladiators in bloodthirsty arenas

Enter the Dragon

Black-robe crooked-balance

Souls bought and sold and paroled for thirty talents

Court reporter catch the surface on the paper

File it in the system not acknowledged by the Maker

Swearing by the bible blatantly blasphemous

Publicly perpetrating that "In God We Trust"

Cross-examined by a master manipulator

The faster intimidator

Receiving the judge's favor

Deceiving sabers doing injury to they neighbors

For status, gratis, apparatus and legal waivers

See the bailiff

Representing security

Holding the word of God soliciting perjury

The prosecution

Political prostitution

The more money you pay.. the further away solution

Legal actors

Babylon's benefactors

Masquerading as the agency for the clients

Hypocritical giants

Morally non-compliant

Orally armed to do bodily harm

Polluted, recruited and suited judicial charm

And the defense isn't making any sense

Faking the confidence of escaping the consequence

That a defendant is depending on the system

Totally void of judgment purposely made to twist em'

Emotional victim blackmailed by the henchmen

Framed by intentions

Inventions whereby they lynch men

Enter the false witness slandering the accused

Planting the seed openly showing he's being used

To discredit, edit, headed for the alleged

Smearing the individual fearing the unsuspected

Expert witness (the paid authority)

Made a priority to deceive the majority

Of disinterested peers

Dodging duty for years

Hating the process

waiting to be returning to their careers

Do we expect the system made for the elect

To possibly judge correct?

Properly serve and protect?

Materially corrupt

Spiritually amuck

Oblivious to the cause

Prosperously bankrupt

Blind leading the blind

Guilty never defined

Filthy as swine

A generation purin it's own mind

Legal extortion

Blown out of proportion

In vein deceit

The truth is obsolete

Only two positions:

Victimizer or Victim

Both end up in destruction trusting this crooked system

Mafia with diplomas keeping us in a coma trying to own a piece

of the "American Corona"

The Revolving Door

Insanity every floor

Skyscraping, paper chasing

What are we working for?

Empty traditions

Reaching social positions

Teaching ambition to support the family superstition?

When the Son of Podition is Commander in Chief

The standard is Thief

Brethren can we candidly speak?

Woe to the men

Trusted in the chariots dem'

Leaning on horses

They run their intellectual sources

Counterfeit wisdom creating the illusion of freedom

Confusion consumes them

Every word they speak it turns them out really white

Internally they absent of light

trapped in the night and bonded to the Cain of the night

Under the curse

Evil men waxing more worse

Faxing the first

Angelic being cast to the earth

It's time for rebirth

Burnin up the branch and the root

The empty pursuits of every tree bearing the wrong fruit

Turning me ill

Let him who stole, no longer steal

Oh it's real

Surrender for Jehovah is real

How long will you sleep

Troubled by the thoughts that YOU keep

The idols YOU heap

Causing the destruction you reap

Judgment has come

Find it and return to the One

Abandon the flesh

Self-interest: Broadway to death

Pride and the Greed

Hide and subdividing the seed

The knowledge of Good and Evil is what caused us to lie

Caused us to die

Let your emotions be crucified

Renounce all your thoughts

Repent and let your mind be re-taught

You'll find what you sought...was based on the deception you bought

A perception of naught

Where the majority remains caught

LAURYN HILL

Hello 2010 ?

Women- Weak Women

With all the opportunities that women have been given, I am baffled at the general dependency most develop. With all the examples of strong women, I am confused with the lack of integrity. I, myself, am not grown or a woman for that matter, a young lady if you please. It only starts now though. The girls around me are such bitches with no morals and extraordinary expectations. No girl I have ever met has ever seen what she has and appreciated it.

Its obvious females are walking emotional contradictions. But the women who never see her man for what he is, and not what he can do for her are the women that are literally impossible to please. Unless you can turn cartwheels while flipping pancakes they won't be pleased. Personally I want honesty & compliments, w/o 24/7 attention. Just enough is fine. So you will virtually never find a female who will be "pleased" but you will find someone who will be loved/ complimented/ told the truth w/ much appreciation for the principle of feeling like someone is trying for her. -December 15 at 10:51pm

2009

( ) stayed single for the whole year
(x) made out in/on a car
( ) kissed in the snow
(x) celebrated Halloween
( ) kissed in the rain
(x) had your heart broken
() broke someone else’s heart
( ) had a stalker
(x) went over the minutes on your cell phone
(x) had a good relationship with someone
() someone questioned your sexual orientation
( ) gotten pregnant
( ) had an abortion
(x) have a relationship with someone you’ll never forget
(x) done something you’ve regretted
(/) lost faith in love
( ) kissed under a mistletoe

OTHER
(x) painted a picture
(x) wrote a poem
(x) ran a mile
( ) shopped at Hollister or Abercrombie and Fitch
(x) posted a blog
(x) listened to music you couldn’t stand
(x) went to a sleepover
(x) went camping
() threw a surprise party
() laughed till you cried
( ) laughed till you peed in your pants
( ) visited a foreign country
(x) cut in a line of waiting people
(x) told someone you were busy when you weren’t
( ) partied to celebrate the new year
(x) cooked a disastrous meal
(x) lost something/someone important to you

In 2009 I…
(x) broke a promise
(x) lied
(x) went behind your parents back
(x) cried over a broken heart
(x) disappointed someone close
(x) hid a secret
(x) pretended to be happy
( ) slept under the stars
( ) kept your new years resolution
(x) forgot your new years resolution
(x) met someone who changed your life
() met one of your idols
(x) changed your outlook on life
(x) sat home all day doing nothing
(x) pretended to be sick
( ) left the country
(x) almost died
(x) given up something important to you
(x) lost something expensive
(x) learned something new about yourself
(x) tried something you normally wouldn’t try and liked it
(x) made a change in your life
(x) found out who your true friends were
(x) met great people
(x) stayed up til sunrise
(x) cried over the silliest thing
( ) was never home on weekends
( ) got into a car accident
(x ) had friends who were drifting away from you
(x ) had someone close to you die
( ) had a high cell phone bill
(x) spent most of your money on food
( ) had a fist fight
("/ ) went to the beach with your best friend
(x ) saw a celebrity
(x) gotten sick
( ) liked more than 5 people at the same time
(x) became closer with a lot of people

LAME YEAR.

I hate feelings but I feel the extreme. Its either love or hate with me. I'm either completely in love with you or I hate everything about you. Its annoying 'cause I hate dramatics yet my feelings are way too ridiculous to be on an understandable scale. I don't want to feel anything, I don't want to have a strong perception. I don't like being susceptible to unsensible susceptibilities. Mm yea, that made sense.

On the subject of hate, I hate 2009. Still in the midst of the stupidest year ever conjured up by Mother Nature & Father Time. At the end of last year I said I was proud to have come out human. It would be totally invalid to say the same now. Change is great but stability is way better. This whole year was full of unnecessary change. Its about that time for making resolutions & I can't think of any. All the ones that come to mind are shallow & hardly self- fulfilling.

At this point my two options for stability are a prefrontal lobotomy or growing up. Seeing that lobotomies don't always end pleasant, my maturity will shoot through the roof.





DISCLAIMER: This is about no one but myself -_-

Behold

Rise up
My beautiful sisters
Victory is yours

Wrap yourself
In the purple cloth
The color
Fit for a queen

Let all
That imitate
The color of your skin
The fullness of your lips
The contour of your hips
Bow down
Before you
And give you
What you are due

Praise
You are
The ultimate woman
That goddess
On high ground
That all others
Behold

My dad took this and edited it lol and I just found it on his laptop.